Hippocrates Geometrica

I was dreaming of the Proust Geometrica again when the question struck me - would it be possible to integrate my interest in design with a career in medicine? Well, why not?

The idea is to have a stylishly and ergonomically designed hospital/clinic catering to rich patients. Through the use of colours and design, the building aims to improve the emotional conditions of patients and staff, which then leads to better health. This is not dissimilar to the concept proposed by the folks over at Reversible Destiny, that our surroundings influence our health. Perhaps they might even be interested in a tie-up, though it is likely most patients would be too sceptical.

Equipment and technology would have to be beyond state of the art, possibly state of the sketch, e.g. custom stethoscopes for comfort and better hearing. The facility would have to provide service commensurate with its setting, which would be comparable to hotels or resorts. Perhaps a better term might be medical integrated resort, like the IR, only better. Food is the most visceral way by which such a place may be judged, so some resident Michelin-star chefs/Makansutra hawker legends could be engaged to cater to all diets for patients, visitors and staff. Hydroponics farms could be attached to provide the freshest and healthiest food and drugs.

A high doctor/nurse/butler-patient ratio, coupled with exacting service standards would ensure the best possible treatment and stay for patients. Staff would be highly trained in many areas, including fitness, to ensure prompt locomotion and response to emergencies. As such, floortiles and trainers/sneakers/shoes would be designed for traction and speed. Also under consideration is the use of fireman poles, skis and scuba gear depending on the location and architecture of the facility. Staff would wear uniforms designed to project a classy, professional image, with avant-garde style and cuts. Possible influences include: witch doctors, shamans, clowns, The Joker, other psychopomps, badass trench-coat-wearers from The Matrix, James Bond, superheroes.

One problem might be that patients enjoy their stay so much they do not want to be discharged, or they malinger to enter again. This can be solved by having guided tours and public viewing areas, which allows the facility to double as a medical science centre and gallery/museum/food court/fashion parade/shopping centre. The facility would serve multiple, integrated functions, exploring the nature of spaces and interactions of purpose (especially in a land-scarce country), and also boosting medical tourism and also general tourism for Singapore.

After the success, there is no reason to stop at only one facility. There could be an entire chain of such healthcare facilities, with the high-end flagship medical integrated resort and low-end hospitals/clinics. After all, why should restauranteurs and chefs be able to open chains and not doctors? The publicity garnered would help the growth of the chain. In fact, it would be quite easy to go global. The money made from the premium healthcare services would be channeled into further research, as well as highly subsidised healthcare for needy in the lower-end hospitals/clinics. In fact, the money being used for charity could be used to persuade richer patients to part with even more of their money, since the ailing feel more empathy for others in similar shoes.

Sustained growth of the chain would allow the takeover of companies and Premiership football clubs. Once the population of patients/staff/families grows beyond a certain threshold, the healthcare chain assumes a level of national identity, especially when united (no pun intended) by a common football club to support. At this point it becomes appropriate to tax them, and establish armed forces consisting solely of real men (think Rambo, Riddick or Bruce Lee) and declare independence. Sith-Nazgûl hybrids would form the cavalry, dragoons would be mounted on dinosaurs, and the armoured division would pilot legendary mecha built by long-lost civilisations.

Since everyone will become sick at some point, and the chain ostensibly provides the best healthcare, it is not difficult to persuade people to defect, and eventually the best scientific and strategic minds will join. At this point a takeover of the world becomes possible. This is when the scientists at SETI (now under my rule) start locating extraterrestrial civilisations to treat.

Or it might be easier to just buy a Proust Geometrica for my office in the hospital. (For the patient to sit on of course, so I get to look at it.)